firstweek

Knowing how and when you are not able to take something else in is knowing yourself. When is enough, enough for you? Let the water fill the bucket and spill out. Use the things that spill out for something that makes you feel better; a glass of water maybe?

5] Where is the distinction between survival and defeat?

It is crucial to think of yourself and your safety and energy throughout the day.
Not having enough energy to see all the people you do not agree with, for example the ‘make America great again’ hat, but also knowing that it will be a huge conflict if you try to have a discussion and get your point across.
A project would be sunglasses that filter out the red. So you do not have to see it that way, but you know that you took your own complaint into action, into something that you feel that you have power of your complaint in a way.

Just like Joep van Lieshout; he made an entirely self-sufficient commune in Rotterdam that existed for only a year. It was a spartan utopia that also needed to be able to defend itself, hence this car with a cannon mounted on the rear.

6]

"I have been thinking about that: how sometimes we have to
stop what we are doing to feel the true impact of something,
to let our bodies experience that impact, the fury of an
escalating injustice, a structure as well as an event; a
history, an unfinished history."

To be human means being put in situations that are unfair and unexpected. You grow by learning how to take control over those moments that cannot be controlled. In order to do that, you need to take control over the only thing you can control, which is yourself. To know how to react and to take care of yourself.

Recently, I have had a situation where it was crucial to react the way Ahmed is describing; to stop what I was doing and feel the impact of it. At the beginning of this year I suffered a stroke, even though I was living healthy and being young of age. That forced me to be in the hospital for a week and after that, restart the way I was living. Everything related to language had been damaged, my energy was limited as well as my ability to concentrate. There was no way to fight against it- I was bound to let it happen. Even though I did not know how this situation will impact my live, and I still don’t, I had no other choice than to live it.

This was paired by feeling all the emotions above, but also with an obsession to capture these months. I was not able to remember a lot, thus the urge. I wanted to feel everything and to remember those feelings for the rest of my live. So I could learn from it.
In the blogpost from Ahmed, I felt a certain understanding in her words. I felt reassured. That it is not always the best way to try to push against the stream, but to get carried away once in awhile. To accept what was happening and find another way to let it out. But to feel it at first.

-->The more you do not get through, the more you have to do. You change tactics.

She stopped the car because she knew that what she felt would come out, one way or another; an accident or a poem.<--

--> There is only so much you can take on as there is only so much you can take in.

Sara Ahmed is a scholar. Her work includes feminist, race and queer theories. She has worked as a professor but is now focusing on writing research, as well as lecturing.

indigenous = inheems

It is crucial to think of yourself and your safety and energy throughout the day.
Not having enough energy to see all the people you do not agree with, for example the ‘make America great again’ hat, but also knowing that it will be a huge conflict if you try to have a discussion and get your point across.
A project would be sunglasses that filter out the red. So you do not have to see it that way, but you know that you took your own complaint into action, into something that you feel that you have power of your complaint in a way.